First, thank you to all who reached out to me after my last blog. Again, I don't typically share that kind of information about myself. I believe that I should handle my own problems and not be a burden or annoyance to others. Seriously, that's how I feel about myself...that others have their own problems to deal with and they are more important than mine. So writing about some of my issues was huge and scary for me. So thank you.
But today, is to talk about the opposite. The positive signs in my life. The funny thing about the acting profession is that you're only as good as your last job. People have short-term memories in this business. So if I go more than a week without getting an audition, I get depressed. I start thinking that I'm not good enough to be pursuing this professionally.
But then an audition will come in for a national commercial or a TV series and all of a sudden, I'm back! I lose the feeling that I'm failing. It doesn't matter if I don't get the part or even a callback. It matters that I got an audition. And that must mean that they like me. They really like me!
This week, I had a commercial audition, my first in a couple of weeks. Really, two weeks without a commercial audition and it sends me on a downward spiral? Well there were other factors involved in that, (see my last blog). This particular casting office is an office I've auditioned for dozens of times over the years. It's been a while since my last time there. So I've thought they must not like me anymore because I've never booked. Ergo they stop calling me in. Then, they call me in for a national commercial audition and I think, I guess they DO like me. You see how this works? Up. Down. Up. Down.
OK, so I'm FINALLY getting to the meat of this blog.
So I walk in and there sits Rick Overton and Barry Livingston (he played Ernie on My Three Sons). And I think, "Holy Crap! How did I get in here?" Seriously. I grew up watching My Three Sons. Saturday nights on CBS right after The Jackie Gleason Show. I'm in the big leagues. I mean these guys have been series regulars. They've been around for a few decades. They know people. They've lived a life I've only dreamed of. Now here we are auditioning for the same job. Wow. Just wow.
So today, I am in a good place. Because, wouldn't you know the very next day I got another commercial audition. So suddenly, life isn't so bad. There is a glimmer of hope. Maybe I will book a few of these jobs and be able to quit my day job.
Tomorrow, I open in another show. And it's completely sold out for its entire run. It's only running this week and next. 11 performances. The show opens tonight but I will not be going on until tomorrow due to a previous commitment. The show? Chico's Angels Waikiki: Chicas Five-O.
And it's hilarious! We had a small invited audience at last night's dress rehearsal. They laughed and screamed through the entire show. It was a rough dress rehearsal, as most are. There were missed cues, props, entrances, lines dropped, only half the costumes. But it didn't matter. We got through it. And I'm learning so much working with this troupe of players. They are pros, every last one of them and damn good at what they do. I feel out of my league. (There's those negative thoughts again).
But all it takes is for one person to laugh at something I do onstage, and I'm okay. I guess I'm not so bad after all. Maybe I can hold my own up here. (C'mon, Richard. You know perfectly well that you can do more than hold your own on stage). That's the mature, logical voice inside my head talking back to the other negative, small child voice inside my head. They're constantly going at it. It's annoying.
Hmm, maybe I am bipolar. Or schizophrenic.
Feeling better. Thank you!
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